30 Weeks!

Let me start by saying that this post is bitter sweet. While I continue to enjoy and celebrate a pregnancy that is going smoothly and know that a family is going to have a new little blessing soon, I write knowing that a dear friend has suffered yet another miscarriage. I don't understand why some little soles have to leave this world sooner than others. My heart is so heavy for my dear friend knowing her struggles to conceive. It greatly saddens me for those who strongly desire to have children of their own yet can not for what ever reason! It's such a reminder to me that I've been greatly blessed with two amazing children and know that they have been placed in my life for a very special reason. I continue to hope and pray for my dear friend that she will some day soon be able to experience the joys of parenthood!

As for this pregnancy, Little Miss Wiggles is just that, wiggling all the time! I've had a few crazy episodes of her spazzing out with a series of kicks and jabs but nothing that has been painful yet. Only once she has woken me up from a nap and once during the night. I think she spins quite happily in there. My belly seems to be a different shape every morning depending on how she moves. I also think she is shy...because every time I try to have the family feel her movements, she settles right down. Go figure.

Lately, I have been devouring blueberries, watermelon, and pineapple. Also loving grilled egg plant with fresh tomato slices and melted provolone. Of course all meat (except fish) has been seasoned with chipoltle...cant get enough of the stuff!! Yum! Thinking I need to up my protein intake as I've been craving lots of carbs but when I have indulged in the carb goodness, it doesn't satisfy. And thank goodness for our little tea shop in town. What a wonderful assortment of organic teas they offer. Grandma's Garden is my favorite and makes a lovely ice tea which in this HOT weather is completely necessary!

The running/jogging days are for sure over! Certainly because it's so hot outside now but also because I tried a few weeks ago and, nope it was a no-go! BUT, I still have aqua aerobics. Exercise during pregnancy has been amazing. I'm a huge advocate for it. The benefits are countless. Hoping that once Little Miss is born I can start running again and possibly attempt my first 5K next 4th of July!

Now that I am at the 10 week countdown point, a whole new thought process has begun. I had my first moment of, "oh, yeah...gotta do the labor thing again!" Yikes! Wondering what the circumstances will be leading up to the wonderful day. I've had several pregnancy dreams where the labor was so fast that the family couldn't make it in time. More of an unpleasant dream really. While I can only hope for a quick labor and delivery I would definitely be sad if the family couldn't be there for the special event. I know that this day that is quickly approaching will be full of emotions! While I can not wait for her to meet her new family, I know it will mean the end of my journey with her. I am just enjoying the little time I have left with her. I hope that my children will be able to meet this sweet little one and say their goodbye's so they have closure too.

24 Weeks!

Yey! The weeks are flying by. Little Miss is growing so much every day. At the last ultrasound she was measuring a little over one whole pound! She has recently had a crazy case of the wiggles and hick-ups! She is super healthy and seems to be really sweet so far!

So excited that I've only gained nine pounds and I'm already half way there! Although I swear my doctor's office scale is way wrong. My scale at home matched the one at the ultrasound office but the doctor's office scale is weighing 5 pounds heavier. Whatever, I know that I'm eating very healthy foods and getting plenty of exercise. I'm loving aqua aerobics classes and walking outdoors in the afternoon sun. Last week and this week some really rocking music was on Pandora and I even jogged for a little bit. Before this pregnancy I started running but have been nervous to over exert myself. I've missed the great feeling of running so I thought I'd give it a try. Lets just say it felt really good to jog and by no means was this a full on sprint. I've read a lot about what pregnant ladies can and cant do when pregnant when it comes to exercise. The majority of the information says don't start something new. Exercise helps with sleep too!

I haven't had many obsessive food cravings. I'm loving all things with chipotle seasoning. And sometimes I really think I could lick a salt lick! (but I promise I wont) Before I was pregnant I swear I could be a fruit-tarian and that certainly has not changed now. As the temperature increases outside, I'm finding many ways to keep cool with fruit. One of my favorites is coconut milk with frozen pineapple in a blender. It's creamy and cold and sweet. Of course my go to snack is ice cold watermelon. Big tip: Don't eat watermelon right before bed. For those of you who are pregnant, this affects you!

This journey has been amazing so far. I was reflecting recently on each pregnancy I've been through. I had my first baby in my late teens, my second baby in my mid twenties, and now a third pregnancy in my early thirties. Each one has been so different mentally. One thing has remained the same, I love being pregnant! I cant wait for this little girl to be born so she can meet her new family. It's like Christmas Eve when the parents have wrapped all the gifts and they are under the tree and you cant wait for the kids to open their gifts to see their happy faces.

Here's to the next half of the pregnancy going well!!!

19 Weeks And It's A...

Where have these weeks gone? Clearly my calling is not as a blogger!

Here's what's new. Whatever mild to nill nausea I may have experienced has gone. Poof, like magic! I'm still a little tired but my body is growing a baby so I don't mind getting a few extra zzz's. I've made the switch to maternity wear for the most part due to comfort. And so far I've only gained 8 pounds to date. Not bad if I do say so myself. I can still fit in my pants with a belly band belt but the belt sits right over where the baby is and not comfortable. Yes, there is a pooch now. The little belly fat I did have prior to pregnancy has been pushed up so now it feels like I look farther along than I really am. I'm sure it is just everything rearranging in there. I have been feeling baby flopping in there since 13 weeks. The flopps and rolls have now turned into more of a defined movement of little arms and legs but no karate chops or elbow jabs yet. The hubbs got to feel it twice. And while I'm on the subject of the hubbs, he is too cute. He was really involved in our own two kids pregnancies. He would sing to them, talk to them, and always had his hand on my belly. I loved it. This time around I wasn't sure what part he would play as its not OUR child. He's definitely my support partner in all this! I assumed he would be removed and unattached. Wrong. I think he loves the whole process as much as I do. What a surprise!  We both are so amazed at how God grows babies. They are their own little miracle.  Yes,  his hand is always on my belly now and I think he may have a harder time saying goodbye than I will in a few more months.  It's just such a blessing to have a partner who is by my side through this surrogacy process. 

This pregnancy has been a piece of cake so far and not by my own strength.  I am very much feeling the prayers of those around me.  It really is through God's grace that I am able to go on this journey. 

So last week was the big ultrasound! It was so much more advanced than with my own two kids.  Every inch of the baby was measured. Even down to the three didgets on the pinky finger.  Love technology!  Parts of it were 3-D and others were infrared and you could see blood flow through the heart.  Wow! So cool!

The most awesome part is that the baby is a girl!!!... And she's healthy. 

The family is thrilled and we are so happy for them too! 

Twelve Weeks!

Where have the weeks gone? They have been filled with lots of ups and downs for me. All is well with the pregnancy and baby, fortunately, but it was kinda scary there for a minute. Let me first say that it is confirmed that there is only one baby. One very healthy baby. So cute watching this tiny little being wiggle around on the ultrasound with arms and legs. Such an incredible reminder of the miracle taking place inside the womb.

The past few weeks have been consumed with getting insurance activated, switching care providers, and doctor visits. And continuing weekly blood draws to monitor hormone levels. If I were to give one piece of advice to someone considering surrogacy, it would be...be prepared to be poked. A LOT! Not only are there weekly blood draws but then there's all the injections that occur. My last injection was February 16th! Hooray! The last few weeks of injections I developed large walnut size bumps at the injection site and they were very painful. So thankful to be done with those.

 Let me just say that there are several things I didn't expect to experience as a surrogate but mostly I didn't realize how responsible and protective over this little baby I would feel. While there is great responsibility to care for another person's child, I simply didn't realize how strongly I would feel this while carrying the baby.

So a few weeks ago I started spotting. Very scary. Don't really know why. Maybe because I stopped my progesterone shots. Maybe because the second embryo that didn't survive was trying to exit my body. But what ever the case, it was really scary. I left town for a few days to visit family with the kids but the Hubs couldn't make the trip with me. No problem there because I thought the trip would be a smooth one. I know I'm pretty attached to the Hubs and depend on him for a lot but when I started spotting, I really longed for him to be by my side. I started to panic and let fear set in. I immediately texted a few close friends to ask for prayers. I feel so fortunate that I could contact these ladies as they truly are special and amazing women. One thing that they all reminded me of is that even when we feel all alone, we are not. God is always with us and is our comfort in the face of fear. Duh, I should have remember that. But sometimes we need our friends to remind us of the obvious. Two verses they reminded me of were Isaiah 41:10 and Deuteronomy 31:6.

Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the LORD your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Deuteronomy 31:6



I'm praising God for the positive outcome. Regardless of the cause of the bleeding there is a miracle growing inside me and everyone is healthy. I'm continuing to put my trust in God and have peace that He is in control no matter the situation.

Heartbeat(s)

Well my beta HCG has been steadily rising. This is a great indicator of positive pregnancy. Numbers have been 150, 441, 5263, and 16,296. But the main thing we've all been waiting for are the results of the ultrasound. It was so hard waiting during the hours leading up to the appointment today. As most of you know two embryos were transferred at the end of December. Waiting to find out if both took has been pretty intense. The ultrasound confirmed that there is for sure one healthy embryo! I'm pregnant! The intended family is going to grow again! There is however another blob/mass in there that has yet to be determined weather it's a failed embryo or one that implanted later and is slightly behind in development which would be the reason we couldn't see a heart beat. So no firm answer on weather there are belly buddies in there or just a buddy. There will be more waiting until the embryo(s) are farther along when another ultrasound can confirm more accurately the specifics. Hooray, a baby is on the way! So far I'm feeling great! Just a little sleepy in the early evenings. Ok, so I can't keep my eyes open passed eight but I'm not complaining.

It Just Might Be Official!

Sooo, the news we've all been waiting and hoping for! Blood level of first beta test was 150. This is a great sign that I'm pregnant but we needed today's beta test to at minimum double and it almost tripled coming in at 441! Woot woot! Pregnancy confirmed via blood hormone level! This is very encouraging.

There are still lots of fun tests and pokes that I have to go through before I'm in the clear like weekly blood tests to monitor all kinds of hormone levels. Just when I thought all that fun stuff would come to an end. Looks like I'll be on shots till mid February. You should see the giant bruises on my hips so far. The injection sights are also hard as rock. This was not an anticipated side affect but one that I must deal with. Also I'll have an ultrasound in just a few weeks to confirm a few things. First that the pregnancy is still viable and second to determine if both embryos implanted or just one. I might pass out if there's two but no matter the outcome is all in God's plan. Quite an exciting day. 

Overall I'm feeling quite well. No nausea yet. I wonder if that means it's a girl since I didn't have nausea with my daughter's pregnancy. I'm only slightly tired at the end of the day but then again who isn't?! The tentative due date is September 14th which means I'm 4 weeks and 3 days pregnant even though I've only been carrying the embryo for 12 days. Go figure on those calculations! The science behind this has been intriguing and the miracle of life, well just that. A miracle! So happy for the family!

Cautiously Optimistic

Well today certainly has been an exciting one. I was a bundle full of nerves this morning. While I was getting ready and trying to rush the kids along, I was praying for peace no matter what the outcome of the blood test. I remembered that I had just downloaded a ba-zillion Beth Moore books. I love her studies and thought I might find some pearl of wisdom to hold on to for the day. Two pieces jumped right out at me. The first was the title, "My God is huge and my God is able. If I don't get what I ask him for, I know I'll get something bigger." She gives a great devotional and in it provides the following verse.

You alone are the LORD. You made the heavens, even the highest heavens, and all their starry host, the earth and all that is on it, the seas and all that is in them. You give life to everything, and the multitudes of heaven worship you. Neh 9:6


I don't know, it just struck me that God really is all powerful and really is the life giver! He truly is almighty. No matter the outcome of the pregnancy, God is in control and He knows the bigger and perfect plan. 

Now on to the exciting news...
Results say pregnancy hormone level is at 150! That's a great thing! I'm still cautious to say that I'm pregnant but I'm hopeful that the next blood test in two days confirms today's exciting news by tripling. Trusting in God's perfect plan! Eagerly awaiting to find out if there will be one or weather there will be belly buddies. So happy for the family!